Merry Christmas

Or so I thought it was.... Well once again for about what must be the 20th christmas my mom has ruined it... I honestly don't understand what her problem is and why she has to make everyone around her as miserable as she is... While other people were waking up to breakfast being cooked for them or the sounds of laughter and presents being torn open I was being woken up by a snatch! Ben ended up staying the night last night because we are having a bad winter storm currently and he was planning on going out and plowing... well my mom decided she had to call me at work to tell me this but asked me to tell ben to not leave his car here if he went plowing so that if her plow company came to do her driveway it would at least get halfway done with our cars at the top of the driveway and i told ben and he said that if it didn't get plowed by her company he would take time off to come and plow it with his crew... So at 8am this morning she barges into my room and decides that 8am is the best time to bitch about this.... mind you they hadn't even come and plowed any of the other driveways on her street... Her plowing company sucks and they don't normally come out until the next day or late at night the night it snows.. So I called ben and asked him to come plow the driveway for her.. fine no big deal with ben.. meanwhile she's just ranting and raving about other shit that isn't even related to the plowing... and is telling me that we don't know how to do anything and if we want anything for breakfast we're on our own (fine with me i can cook a hell of a lot better than she can) and then has the nerve to ask me to look for her morning paper while they're plowing the driveway... Really?!?!?! Is she nuts? so then we come back in after getting the cars moved and the driveway plowed (mind you we moved ALL cars out of the driveway so that the entire thing would be plowed) then she starts up again about shit i don't even remember... i honestly think i stopped listening after she asked me to "fetch" her her morning paper.. so then she decides shes going to go up to her room and stay there the entire day (fine by me!!) and after watching part of my favorite christmas movie i decided i should probably shovel the back patio and the front sidewalks... so i go ahead and do so and meanwhile she decides she's not going to stay in her room and decides that she wants to watch tv downstairs... well that really didn't sit well with me because roxy likes to hang out downstairs and if i'm in my room watching tv (because we are only allowed to watch what my mom is watching downstairs and nothing else) then i get yelled at for not paying attention to my dog but i'm not going to make her go somewhere she doesnt want to be... and usually i watch tv while shes napping ... but whateve.. so i decided to be a bitch and take the remote and continue to watch what i was watching while her show was on a commercial.. that didnt fly with her... she started bitching and yelling again and demanded the remote from me.. i told her not until she could talk to me like an adult and ask nicely that pissed her off more i guess... so she tried to take it from me and i tossed it onto her chair.. which the remote ended up bouncing off her chair and over it towards the christmas tree (which is a whole other story...) and so what does she do... she hits me on the forehead... wham no regret or anything... SO i went after her but didn't hit her i just pushed her aside and grabbed the remote and dropped it into her chair... and then i proceeded to hand her her christmas gift and of course give her a little attitude and tell her merry fucking christmas.. well as i was going upstairs i hear something hit the step i was just on... and no surprise there it was the gift i just gave her... she seriously tried to hit me with that too... so i come back downstairs and decide i've had it and am going to get roxy my phone and my milk and go upstairs and leave her alone... as i grab my milk (i did grab it too hard) i brought it around to me over her (she was sitting in her chair) and some of it spilled on her... that's when she gave me my real christmas present... eviction... as of today i have 30 days to vacat her property and find a place to live... where am i going to go? i dont know... how am i going to afford an apartment? i don't know probably a second job... and what will happen to roxy? either find a pet friendly apartment or she'll have to live with ben's parents.. of course after all this went down i did call ben and told him to pick me up so that i could get out of the house otherwise one of us was going to end up either dead or in jail on christmas.... he is furious with my mom (mind you ben already does not like her and tries to be civil with her but can not stand her) so he decides that hes going to try and talk to her when he gets over here... he first asks her what her problem is and why she's in such a horrible mood and then asks her what the reason for hitting her own daughter on christmas... all she has to say is that shes sick of us and is done with us... and then proceeds to tell us that i don't do shit around her house and all i do is lay around all day... i think she has the wrong child there... i do the dishes reagularly, take out the garbage(because they let it overflow), clean up after her and my brother, and vacuum (not regularly but at least once every two weeks)... what does my brother do around the house? nothing... he hardly cleans up after himself he never does the dishes never takes out the trash unless you nag him about it and doesn't even pick up a vacuum... he sits around all day on his ass playing his video games or on his computer prolly looking up porn since he's a loser and maybe he'll throw away the empty milk jugs but that's it... so ben is also asking her other questions about where this has all stemmed from and my mom keeps telling him of things that have happened in the past year or at least happened 6 mos or longer... can't give him anything recently and keeps changing the subject from me to james and to ben somehow... so we resolve nothing and ben finds it best to get me out of the house for the day... mind you we just got about 6 inches maybe and have wind gusts up to 50mph today here... and so now we have to drive across town in his little car and try and not get stuck me him and roxy... well we make it into his neighborhood and get stuck half way up his street... but i must say for a crappy start to my day it was an alright christmas... not the best obviously.. but i did get to spend the day with a real family and a family that i love... his parents are amazing.. they actually ask how your day was and ask how work is going and actually care about you and listen to your answers or any concerns.. like real parents should... and his sister is super cool.. she's funny and is always picking on his lil brother (of course) but they're a real family and i really can't wait for the day that i can join and be apart of that family... im glad i got to spend christmas with loved ones today and am disappointed to see that my mom and my relationship has not gotten better over the last few weeks.. i've been trying and obviously nothing has been happening and nothing has been done right... well i guess that's according to her.. but maybe its a sign that i am ready to be on my own again and am ready for a change.. hopefully... i just don't know how i'm going to do this but hopefully it all works out for the best... and hopefully roxy is one happy pup after all this and mine and ben's relationship is stronger than before... i know i shouldnt really say this but i wish my mom was the one that was dead and my dad was still alive... he acutally listened and seemed like he cared more about us then my mom does... i know none of this would be happening if he were still around.. and as my mom says that i keep telling her that i'm done with her when i leave... she's right and i'm sorry that it has to be this soon i thought it would have never come to that and that we could have worked out our differences and build a better relationship but obviously thats not possible.. so i hope she's happy with her decision to evict me and the rest of her life without a daughter cuz as far as shes concerned... shes dead to me. .. i have no mother.. my only mother will be my mother in law someday... i just feel horrible that this ruined my brother and ben's christmas's... i wish there was a way to make it up to them both but ben said he was happy that we got to spend the day together and that's all that really matters... which is true... i would be much more of a wreck than i am currently if he weren't here to help me deal with this today... but for now i eed to get some zzz's and try and forget about this for a little while but for now we play the waiting game and see if she's goign to hold true to this eviction or if shes going to let me stay like the last time she tried kicking me out... but i will keep you updated as soon as i know and hopefully whatever way this goes all will go well and something good will come out of this... so i hope you all had a wonderful christmas and have a happy new year... i know that my resolution will be to start anew and cherish the relationships i have in my life.. good night and i love you all